Recently I was asked the question “What is the single most impactful relationship for your mental health?”
I thought about it for a moment, because it’s an important question. With an extensive background in social inclusion, I agree that the relationships in our life matter. The people we surround ourselves with, the communities we are a part of.
Communities matter
But – that’s not the answer. While there have been many people and groups that have supported me and my journey (I would not be where I am today without these people!), that’s not the starting point. They are not the most important relationship for my mental health.
Focusing first on people and communities for wellness can create an imbalanced relationship where we’re looking externally for a solution. I’m not saying we should be isolated until we are well, or until we have become the person we want to be. Quite the opposite really.
This relationship matters more
However I believe without question that the single most impactful relationship for my mental health is the one I have with myself. Focusing on healing and improving the relationship I have with myself is what allows me to add value to the people in my life and the communities I am a part of.
By trying to improve my relationships with others before improving my relationship with myself, there are some issues that appear. Firstly, this removes control of my mental health away from me, and gives it to the actions of others. If I do not have a healthy relationship with myself, then my wellness will be tied to how someone else things, feels, and acts.
Secondly, relationships are a two way street. If they are in the community or in our homes. Between several people or one-to-one. If I am looking to get value for a relationship, I have to be able to bring value. And to do so, I need to be able to value myself.
Read more about ‘The Single Most Impactful Relationship for My Mental Health’ here on Thrive Global.
